how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Randomize
