I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
