Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Randomize
