this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Randomize