After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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