I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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