i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
