he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Randomize
