dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
