Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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