If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
Randomize
