The maid of honor just puked.
yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
