did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
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