The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
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