Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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