Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
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