wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Randomize
