I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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