i don't like sucking hair
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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