So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I forgot wine drunk hurts
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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