If i come over, it means nothing
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
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