There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Randomize
