Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
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