He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
