Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
