Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
I look excited, but its just a facade.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
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