I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
