did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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