He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
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