Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Randomize
