it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
Randomize
