i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
