Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Randomize
