I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
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