The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
