I'm going to jail i love you
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
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