One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
