Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize