ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
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Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
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