Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Even my vagina gasped.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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