My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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