New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
