Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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