Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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