If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
