I didn't shave. On purpose
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Randomize
