We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
