The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
