well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Randomize
