Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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